


One Last Time

by BabbaArts



Series: Jamilton One-Shots [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alexander dies, Angst, Hanahaki Disease, How Do I Tag, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 14:09:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9388676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabbaArts/pseuds/BabbaArts
Summary: Alexander found himself to love Thomas, but when the first petal was coughed up he knew he didn't have much time left.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sorry. I wrote this at midnight and I was tired so if there are any mistakes then I'll fix it later.

 

Alexander had always hated Thomas Jefferson with a burning passion, the moment that man's mouth opened he knew that it was a rivalry to be created. Yet how did this happen? How was Alexander now on the ground, his breathing almost non-existent, coughing up blood stained petals?

The disease

The one he had gotten and never got treatment.

Because of him.

Because of Thomas Jefferson.

That idiotic, pompous, France-loving bastard was literally going to be the death of poor Alexander, who lay helplessly on the floor, wheezing and coughing. He never wanted this, but when that crush devopled and the first petal got coughed up, he knew it was the end of him.

Alexander had gotten the Hanahaki disease, where, to put it simply, you fall in love with another person but the person doesn't return the feelings. Flowers grow into your lungs and eventually clog up your lungs and esophagus, leading to suffocation. You were allowed to get surgery to get the flowers removed, but that would cause the feeling of love to go away, and, in worse cases, forgetting the one you loved.

After finding out that he was helplessly in love with that damn Jefferson, he started to feel weird contractions in his chest, or feeling breathless at times. He'd get lightheaded or have trouble breathing, he even coughed up a single petal, so he did his research and was devastated with the results. He didn't want to confess to Jefferson in fear of rejection, but he didn't want to risk the consequences of treatment, either, so he just let it be. Yes, it was a stupid move, Alexander can admit, but he just loved the way Jefferson made him feel, a nice, warm, and gooey feeling. Alexander spent all the time he had left with friends, made goodbyes seem like the last, made sure they were happy enough so his passing wouldn't hurt too much, and of course he made sure they wouldn't miss him for too long.

He also tried to get along with Jefferson as much as he could, he even brought it upon himself to call him Thomas, it felt good on his tongue, and the best part was that Thomas didn't seem to care, he even looked...happier. Alexander made sure to bond with him, be able to take in all of his looks for what could be the last time. He made sure he studied every little thing on Thomas, just to engrave into his memory for when he passed.

He loved the way Thomas tried to hide his laughter at some kind of inconvenience to someone he hated (used to be Alexander and now it was John Adams) or the way his laugh would sound like a dozen angels singing in a choir. The way that Thomas' curly hair frammed his nice face made Alexander's heart skip a beat, his face especially. Thomas' eyes reminded Alexander of a dark honey color, just enough richness to suit his well toned skin and dark stubble that Alexander wished he could touch.

There, on that floor that Alexander was dying on, laid a note, just for Thomas himself. Alexander knew that it was his last day to live, so he invited Thomas over in hopes that he could see him one last time, but his death was approaching sooner than he thought. In the midst of his suffering, there was a knock at the front door "Alex?" he could hear Thomas' southern voice drawl out. He wanted to call out that he was here, buy only managed to cry out his name. Just then, the door bust open and slammed shut, quick moving footsteps approaching Alexander's room, then the door opening.

 

  
Thomas stared at Alexander's weak form curled into a fetal position, shuddering violently at coughs and heavy wheezes. His gut wrenched ant his heart pounded against his ribcage as he hurried to Alexander's side, turning him over and holding him like a baby. "Alexander? Breathe, come on." he licked his lips nervously, watching as Alexander coughed out what seemed to be flower petals "Thomas..." he croaked, a wheeze escaping his lips. Thomas managed a weak smile as Alexander's hand weakly grazed his cheek, suddenly finding himself lean into the touch.

Tears were gushing down Alexander's face now, sobs were turned into coughing fist as more petals were coughed out. Thomas held the hand that was on his cheek, wanting so badly to do something, but there was no helping this situation, it was too late. "Thank you...Thomas..." was all Alexander could manage before he stopped moving, his hand falling limp.

Now it was Thomas' turn to cry, he held the hand that was still a bit warm. His chest hurt, his heart ached and he wanted so badly to go with him, but he couldn't, he needed to call an ambulance. He managed to call them, and they came and took him away, later declaring that Alexander Hamilton was officially dead from the Hanahaki Disease.

Thomas watched as the others mourned at the funeral that a distant family member managed to assemble, though Thomas didn't even know why he bothered to go, but he just felt obligated to. Anger was dull to him but he still felt it, anger to whoever did this to his poor Alexander. He was about to leave when Eliza had walked up to him, holding a letter in her hand "Alexander wanted you to have this." she said shakily, managing to muster up a sad smile as Thomas took the letter. "Thanks. I guess." he said stiffly, staring at the note, and then Eliza was off to mourn.

He couldn't stand being there any longer, so he raced away from where they were burying Alexander and to his car, where he just sat in the drivers seat end stared at the letter. _Well, Thomas?_ he imagined Alexander's voice teasing _Aren't you gonna read it?_ Thomas laughed wetly and unfolded the letter, starting to read.

  
_My Dearest Thomas,_

_It is to my unfortunate intervention to tell you that I, Alexander Hamilton, am helplessly in love with you. By the time you read this, I'll most likely be dead, but please do not mourn for too long, I don't want to die knowing I upset you. I never wanted to tell you of my feelings in fear of the probable rejection, so I kept it to myself; I never went to get surgery because I didn't want to forget my feelings towards you, so I rejected that idea and admired you for as long as I could. Tell the others I said sorry for not telling them sooner, and for them to not to mourn for too long, please. I bid you a farewell, Dearest Thomas, may I see you on the other side._

_With Love,_  
_A.Ham_  
_P.S: Don't take death into consideration, please. Live a happy life without me._

Thomas dropped the letter, a sob escaping his lips as his hands traveled to cover his face. The tears wouldn't stop rushing down his cheeks and hitting the note.

It was his fault.

Alexander died because of him.

Thomas reached for his medicine, taking one and swallowing it dry, staring at the label with bleary eyes.

_Pills to prevent growth of flowers from the seeds in lungs_

He was in love with Alexander.

Now he never had a chance.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sorry. I had the brilliant idea when I was reading a totally different kind of fic, like, it just sprang into existence when I remembered what the Hanahaki Disease was. Anywhore, please give kudos and comment! Also follow me on Tumblr, its thetrashkind, I'm thirsty for followers


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